Keeping Up

Some time ago i spouted about running being a solitary sport. I train alone. I run alone. I am alone. Then, i entertained the thought of running with strangers, one of those running group things. My shyness overtook my need to socialize and i never made it to the pack. Then i thought i would run with friends and that decision filled me with trepidation. What if i couldn’t keep up? What if they wanted to talk the whole time while i can barely breathe at their pace? What if i don’t run long enough? Run hard enough? What if? So i announced i was a solo runner. I train alone. I run alone. I am alone.

Yesterday, i broke my own “rule” and ran with a friend. Intimidation meets reality. She is training for a marathon. She trains with a hard core group that not only runs 7-8 miles as their warm-up, but weight trains three days a week, run sprints (to increase time, of course) once a week and trail run their long runs. In other words, my friend is hard core training. I have nothing to train for, nothing to push for, nothing to inspire me beyond my 3-4 mile world. Deathly afraid of the pain that still haunts my knees i am the quiet, tired and timid. Yet, i agreed to run with my friend.

Yes, she talked the whole time. I was even able to answer back on occasion. At one point she said, “if i’m talking too much, tell me to shut up.” I huffed back, “as long as you don’t get offended if i don’t respond…” I was lame with my excuse, “I’m not used to talking to anyone when i run…” It was feeble and i knew it. It was pathetic. She knew it but didn’t point it out.

We ran for 35 minutes – 3.5 miles. A walk in the park for Miss Marathon but at least i kept up, at least i could talk (somewhat). At least i didn’t collapse. Instead, i overcame something bigger – my fear of the competition that was all in my head.